Monday, February 29, 2016

Little Free Library, Big Daydreams

Have you heard of the Little Free Library idea before? I swoon over them. The whole concept makes me happy and I think they add the cutest touch of character to any neighborhood. The Little Free Library idea is based on take a book, leave a book. People construct (or purchase one pre-made) a free library where local neighbors take a book and a leave another one for someone else to find. It quite literally brings literacy curbside. The website boasts that there are over 36,000 Little Free Libraries across the world with over 9.3 million books shared annually!

5 tips for running a Little Free Library #LibraryLove:

I first saw these back in the community I worked in in Southern California and thought it was such a novel (get it) idea. I was shocked when we saw some house hunting throughout the Houston area and basically drooled over the neighborhoods that we saw them in. I love the concept of creating a shared community and bringing neighbors together. The icing on top is that community is being formed around reading! I would love to see what my neighbors were reading- and not just because I'm a snoop!

Little Free Libraries On A Shoestring Budget - Little Free Library:

So,I really want to have one at our home. We are so proud of our little abode tucked away in the heart of the city and have had a lot of fun finding new things in our neighborhood. Spending so much time around here and getting to know our neighbors, I think that people would love this idea. It very much fits into the offbeat vibe of our area. But there are a couple set backs.. Our townhouse has a teeny, tiny, barely there yard (debatable use of the word, more like space between the windows and the sidewalk), so we would be talking physically about a little, little, liiiiiiiitle Little Free Library.  We also live in a very urban environment. The fact that we can walk to bars, restaurants, public transportation, dog parks, and jogging trails is amazing, but there are also challenges that come with city living. I'm a little nervous if people damage the Little Free Library or misuse it in other ways. 

WASHINGTON, Spokane #2410 I love the roof on this little library!:

Andrew and I need to spend some more time drooling over plans for it thinking about the logistics of having a Little Free Library and see if it something we want to propose to the HOA (knock on wood for us now). 

I think the first book that I would put in there is a toss up between The GiverThe Compleat Wrks of Wllm Shkspr (Abridged), or Work Hard, Be Nice. What would you put in?

Friday, February 26, 2016

Houston In One Day

Since moving to Houston 8 (ahhh- how has it been that long) months ago, I have consistently been impressed with how much this city has to offer. I won't lie, I thought that moving from Southern California to Houston was going to be a little bit of a let down in terms of stuff to do. While yes, we don't have the mountains, beaches, and hiking here- we do have SO many lovely other things! I think here in Houston you have to both know where to look and have to be willing to look!

In that vein, here are my recommendations for a one day adventure in Houston, TX during rodeo season.

Wake up and go for a run around Buffalo Bayou or Memorial Park. You'll thank me for this because A) you need to do this early before the heat gets too, too bad and B) you'll be eating a LOT today. I firmly believe time on your feet and eating are THE BEST ways to get to know cities, so lace up your sneaks and get going. 

Shower up, get some clothes on, and get ready to check out some art and food at the same time. Grab an early brunch at Bistro Menil and then explore the Menil Collection. Brunch isn't exactly cheap, but the museum is absolutely free so it all evens out.The Menil Collection is one of the largest private art collections in the United States and has a unique campus feeling- almost like a neighborhood. Wander through the multiple exhibit halls/houses and make sure you check out the Rothko Chapel.

Now that you've gotten some culture, it is time to grab a beer. St. Arnolds is our favorite brewery in town especially if you are visiting with friends. Bring a board game and play on one of their long tables. My favorites are the Lawnmower and Art Car (seasonal). If their kitchen is open, get the pretzel... its worth it.

Now that you've had some beer, go visit the Beer Can House. This funky and eclectic Houston landmark boasts over 50,000 cans adorning house. I mean, its pretty unique you should check it out.

Time to get ready to RODEO! Stop by Texas Junk Company for some bargain cowboy boots and don your finest attire (with a loose waist band for good ole Texas BBQ). 
 Stop by Biscuit Paint Wall for a fun, group photo...

Then onto the main attraction! head down to NRG for Houstonians' favorite month of the year. Eat all the BBQ that you can manage, check out the livestock show, and then head into the rodeo. You'll even get a live music performance later that evening.

Close out the night with a frozen mojito at Boheme in Montrose! And thank your lucky stars that you're in Texas!

There you go! One jam packed, very Houston day! Hope to see you in Space City soon!

Tuesday, February 23, 2016

Thailand Itinerary

Confession 1- The past week or so I was waking up with cold sweats at night vacillating over whether I've planned way too much or absolutely nothing for our upcoming trip. I then go spend hours on my tripadvisor app in bed trying to screen the bright light of my phone to not wake Andrew up and add 17 more things to our list then promptly remove 24 other things off our itinerary. I started this master organizational sheet with phone numbers and our hotels' names in Thai characters, but I hadn't got more than a couple days in because... well that just isn't really how I like to travel.

In my real life, I have to be organized so things don't fall apart. I meal plan, to-do list, and prioritize everything because if I didn't I'd probably just watch West Wing all day (shout out to Josh Limon). Traveling, however, is a vacation.I love to go with the flow- have a hotel booked and a couple 'must dos' but not hit absolutely everything with a frantic timed schedule. However, since we haven't ever been to an Eastern country before, I was a tad nervous that I need to make sure we have our ducks in a row. My Spanish is deplorable, but at least I TRIED to ask for the bano in South America... my Thai is, well, zilch. So if I could barely find the darn bathroom in Chile, how am I thinking I will navigate 5 cities in Thailand?!?

Confession 2- I basically started writing this post to get my butt into gear on logistics planning, but about halfway through  the itinerary I realized 'oh wow, we do have a lot planned.' I do think we have our bases covered (okay, except one city where we don't have a place to stay yet...) and actually am thinking more broadly now. There are a couple jam packed days that I'm thinking are flexible- like we could do 17 things or we could just walk around and eat a ton of Thai food. So thanks blogosphere for the we-have-actually-planned wake up call! I can now wake up with cold sweats about something else!

Here is how it looks as it stands:

Day 1- Get on plane to THAILAND, take some Nyquil, and fall asleep. OR not fall asleep because although we may be getting on the plane at midnight here in the states, it will be 1pm local time in Bangkok. See whether sleepiness or excited energy for the trip wins out and either sleep or not sleep depending on the victor.

Day 2- Spend the whole damn day on a plane (curse you time changes and long international flights).

Day 3- 
Stretch out legs, see if said legs still move, force said legs to become un-sedentary. ARRIVE IN THAILAND! Be overwhelmed by awesomeness and make out way to hotel! See a man about a suit and Jim Thompson house. If we can stay awake long enough, check out a sky bar and 'the best pad thai in thailand', if not- save those outings for a later day.

Day 4- 
Temple day! Visit the Grand Palace, Wat Phra Kaew, Wat Arun, and Wat Pho while spending the day eating through exploring the city!

Day 5- 
Board a train to Ayutthaya (seriously the train costs like 50 cents), rent bikes to tour the ruins, check out their local food scene (theme), and catch an overnight train.

Day 6- 
Arrive in Chiang Mai in the morning! Check out the Old City (possibly sneak in a monk chat), and climb the 309 steps to Wat Phra That Doi Suthep. If we are being brave... then we may try to motorbike ourselves to the Wat Phra That Doi Suthep... we will see!

Day 7- 
Visit Patara Elephant Park! Possibly what I am the most excited for. After doing a lot on online research about responsible tourism, I feel confident that we picked a good place to spend time with these magnificent creatures. Geek out over said elephants and possibly try to live with them forever.

Day 8- 
Flight to Phuket, boat ride to Phi Phi Island, check in to paradise. Possibly what my husband is most looking forward to will be a couple days of rest, relaxation, and beach. Meet up with a couple friends of ours and enjoy the island.

Day 9- 
Scuba diving! Try to be better than last time...

Day 10- 
Wake up enjoying the island and head out to hike up to Phi Phi Viewpoint. More rest and more relaxation.

Day 11- 
Beachy things and a possible cooking class. Head back on a boat to Phuket.

Day 12- 
Possibly Sea Canoeing with a late night flight back to Bangkok.

Day 13- 
Pick up Andrew's new custom made suit, maybe check out some of the markets if we get the chance, then head to the airport for the trip home! 

So while I know that I probably missed something that MUST BE pre-planned (FOMO), I feel good about our plans for now. Honestly the only way we will find out is by being there! Now if we could make time hurry up! 


Friday, February 19, 2016

Five for Friday: Recent Pinterest Wins

The internet is a big scary place full of drop-5-pounds-in-a-day diets, work-from-home-while-becoming-a-millionaire opportunities, and how-to-get-a-thigh-gap-while-eating-Doritos-on-you-couch programs. I get it. The internet IS a scary place.

One of those scary places is my beloved Pinterest, the space in which I pin all the grand plans and consistently do not accomplish them. But on the other hand I really do not care that I haven't color coded my sock drawer while perfectly applying a homemade gel manicure, so I'm just going to have to let that go. What I really love pinterest for is all the recipes at my fingertips. It makes meal planning go so much easier and spices up the rotation of what we are eating.

These are 5 Pinterest recipes that I have tried and loved recently! If you are in the mood for more, feel free to pop on over to my Pinterest Recipes That I've Actually Tried board and see if anything suits your fancy :)

You can find the previous Pinterest win posts here, and here, and here.

Tasty! Clean Eating Winter Jicama Salsa.  Hard to find good fruit salads over the winter.  This may be just the trick. This is the recipe I was telling you about @Elizabeth Bauer:
Once I realized that I actually could buy jicama at the regular grocery store and not just TJs (surprise anyone else ?!?) I knew that this would be on my list. It is delicious and crunchy and a great dessert. I loved the pop of jalapeno in it, but if you are spice averse just leave it out!

Great and easy! Easy Sweet and Spicy Mexican Cole Slaw:
I'm normally not a cole slaw fan because mayo and me just can't get on the same page. This recipes calls for no mayo (but I bet if you are a fan you could add some) and is a tasty and light side dish. It is also SUPER cheap to make because most of everything (other than the slaw) you probably have in your pantry. I added about half of the amount of honey the recipe calls for and some sunflower seeds for a good bite. 

Garlic and Paprika Chicken - Deliciously baked crispy, juicy and tender chicken drumsticks with a garlic and smoked paprika sauce.:
When drumsticks are on sale for $1 a pound I just have to stock up. This dish is totally easy and awesome. I love having the leftovers for work. My rec would be to not use as much oil as they mention, but other than that the recipe is delicious. 

Good :0 Louisiana Shrimp Gumbo- my husband is full blooded CAJUN- he cooks his gumbo like his Mother and Grandmother did- it is soooooo good cher'! Jeri D.!:
Oh man I love this one. After getting gumbo out  a couple weeks ago, I knew I needed to start making it at home. This was delicious and makes AMAZING leftovers. Seriously, I looked forward to lunch. I omitted the sausage and added about 2x as much veggies (because I'm always sneaking them in somehow). Add this to your meal plan- so tasty.

30-Minute Homemade Marinara ~ quick, flavorful sauce made with ripe tomatoes, fresh herbs, garlic and a touch of balsamic vinegar |
We don't eat a lot of pasta in our house, but this fresh tomato sauce was definitely a treat to have. I'm not a fan of canned sauces, so when something promises me that all it takes is 30 minutes and a ton of veggies I am so there. 

Any favorite Pinterest recipes that you recommend?

Thursday, February 18, 2016

Lies I've Told Myself lately

That my dog has stopped his teething phase and my shoes will soon be safe

That I'll put new sheets on the second bed sometime soon

That I don't get angry at having to spend money on cleaning supplies... especially not at oven cleaner

That "oh yeah that thing" will be our next house project (and not the 1 million others)

That we are ready for our trip to Thailand and that the last leg of the trip will just book itself

That watching the US Marathon Olympic trials didn't make me tear up a bit

That I may feel the urge to purge our whole house of useless stuff again after doing so 8 months ago during the move

That my legs don't feel so dead from (probably) too much speed work

That I didn't cheat on my speed workout today

That I don't wake up at night convinced whatever crime show I just watched is going to happen to me

That I just had to re-re-read that to edit out all double negatives... and that I'm only half convinced I figured it out

That the random bag of red sauce(?!?) is the only thing that I don't remember what it is and why I froze it in our fridge

That I'm not nervous that I may have forgotten all of the camera tips and tricks I learned

That I pretty much ate 2 lunches today (whoops)

That I will return all the voicemails I have been ignoring

That I'm feeling a bit of blogger burn out

That I'm going to fit all my clothes and what not into a small backpack for Thailand... and 3 pairs of shoes

That writing this made me both feel more and less like a slacker

Anyone else out there telling some little white lies?

Wednesday, February 17, 2016

How We Saved on Flights to Thailand

Although we shell out a significant amount of money each month into our travel fund, I am so averse to spending it on transportation. I want to spend it on experiences and food and excitement, so much so that the chunk that goes to whatever airline conglomerate just makes me angry. I already don't like to fly, I already fly with someone that is convinced his legs are too long for any airplane seat, and I already am an inner-cheapskate, so I fully admit that I don't like spending money on flights.

Problem- to get somewhere to spend money on experiences, food, and excitement, you generally have to pay for transportation. Until that one problem can be solved, I have a list of little tricks  

Disclaimer- I'm sure that if I say we spent 14 cents on our upcoming flights to Thailand that someone can say they found them for 12. I'm sure of this and I applaud you. If that is you, you probably don't want to read this. If you are a person that wants to be on decent flights and wouldn't mind saving a bit of money then I hope this helps a bit. 

1) Time of Day

I would much, much, much rather pop on a 16 hour flight late at night because then I can pretty much guarantee that I will sleep. We had a midnight flight to Chile last year and another late cross country trip recently and it just makes the whole thing so much more smoothly for me than having to take more time off work or waking up at 4am to go to the airport. Seeing as how I'm going to be stuck in a metal tube for X hours, I would rather be asleep than 90% of other things. Red eye flights are generally cheaper than other ones and I also love the fact that I'm fully using my vacation days. For this trip to Thailand I'm going to work a full day, come home, change, probably repack my bag, and then head to the airport. That gives me one full day of work that I can tack on at the end of the trip if needed instead of having a 1pm flight out and skipping work that day. 

2) Book Everything Separately

This one saved us literally over a thousand dollars this trip. We knew that we needed a few different flights.

1) flight from USA to Thailand 
2) flight from city 2 (overnight train gets us from city 1 to 2) to city 3
3)City 3 back to city 1 for our return flight home

Confusing?!? Yeah. I first was trying to book this as one big trip and I was shocked by the prices. I split it up into a 1 international trip and then separate domestic flights inside Thailand and got a much better deal PLUS better flight times. The best tool for this was Google Flights. I had about 3 tabs open and was price comparing like it was my job. Yes, it did take about an extra half hour or so of planning time, but a thousand bucks is a lot to save in a half hour! We will have to make sure that we are checked in to each of our separate flights, but I'll take a little bit of housekeeping in order to save that much moolah.

These aren't our flights, or our travel dates, or how much money we shelled out for flights (we actually paid less because we booked further in advance), but here is an example of how it works:

Option 1 is one ticket that covers  USA to Bangkok, Chiang Mai to Phuket, Phuket to Bangkok, and Bangkok to USA would cost $1596 (if you go with the cheapest option)

Option 2 is booking each flight separately. You have a $825 flight to Bangkok, a $68 flight from Chaing Mai to Phuket, and a $62 flight from Phuket to Bangkok. In total you will spend $945 a person, which saves you $651 a person OR $1302 overall!

Now the one thing to bear and mind and do you research with option 2 is each airline's booking fees. Once you poke around a bit you will see if it is worth it to book 2 one way flights or 1 round trip flight, but that isn't rocket science.

3) Actually Think About What You Pack

This was a big money saver when we were flying to Chile as well as on some of our Thailand domestic flights. You definitely need  to check each airline's policy on carry ons verse checked bags. This trip we are going to be on the go a lot and really aren't bringing a ton of luggage. In fact we each are bringing a backpack and that is it. For most of the flights that means we will check one bag and then carry on the other smaller backpack. It saves a chunk of cash, but it also is just less to worry about. I don't really want to be toting a ton of stuff around anyways, so it is motivation to pack light.

None of these are life changing, but none of these are very difficult either. On domestic flights we try to stick to our favorite carriers and earn points there, but flying internationally is a different ballgame.

Any money saving tips you have for flying?

Friday, February 12, 2016

Valentine's Day Truths

Via (With Laughter)

I'm a big fan of low key holidays. St. Paddy's Day may be one of my favorite days of the year, I think July 4th is the best excuse to gorge myself on BBQ and watch things blow up, and I definitely support the idea that everyone should get the day off from work on their birthday. Yes please to all of these things.

Valentine's day is just not one of those exciting days to me. It wasn't as a kid (other than the bag of goodies you got to bring home... normally right before Lent), it wasn't while I was single (other than Galentin-ing like it was my job), and it isn't as a married couple (although I will probably find a way to eat my way through the holiday as referenced above).

Confession 1-Since my husband will be cramming for a certification exam on this Hallmark day of love, we don't have anything other than takeout planned. The only thing I bought my husband for Valentine's Day was bacon. I think he will love it more than most things in life judging from how excited he was when he helped unpack the groceries and the day might go down in the record books because I never buy bacon. #wifewin

Truth 2- I do have a Valentine's Day Date, however. I'm DVR-ing the marathon trials from Saturday and fully intend on planting myself on the couch (ironic, isn't it) to watch 26.2 miles on Sunday. I may wear workout clothes while watching it so I feel in solidarity with the runners.

Truth 3- I may wait to go grocery shopping until later in the week so I can score big on Conversation Hearts that are deeply discounted. They are one of my favorite candies even though 80% of the world is convinced they taste like chalk. If they actually do taste like chalk, you will soon find me at the craft store buying chalk to eat as well. 

Truth 4- I read via Time this week that 55% of Americans celebrate Valentine's Day and that those that do spend on average $146.84 on the day! WHATTTTTT?!? What are all these people getting for this holiday? Am I missing out? Does this surprise anyone else other than me?!?

Truth 5- The only Valentine's Day baked good that I remember making was a Pinterest recipe a couple years ago that used strawberry cake mix as the basis for a chocolate chip cookie. It was absolutely disgusting. I was embarrassed that I hadn't tasted them before bringing them to work... but grateful that I didn't have end up eating them all on my own.

Hope that everyone has a wonderful Valentine's Day weekend however you choose to spend it!

Thursday, February 11, 2016

Shiplap Me Crazy

Goodness gracious the past couple months have been... well they have just been. Andrew is taking a big ole certification exam that is pretty darn important and the only thing that I can do to help is stay out of the way. While I have enjoyed watching every reality TV show (other than the Bachelor... I just can't) and focusing on some running goals, I am pretty darn excited for my partner in crime to be spending less than 12, 14, too many hours a day studying. Like really excited.

In an effort to open him back to the real world with open arms, I've been dreaming up a long honey do list for the man. After heading back from Thailand and the poor man gets a couple moments of down time (I'll be counting them), I would like to get started on some house projects that have been on my Pinterest mind. A project real high on that list is our loft. This is a space where... well there isn't much going on. We have a built in mini-bed and sometimes throw an air mattress up there, but other than installing new floors we haven't done much. It is literally the only room (other than closets) that hasn't been painted and it is an absolute blank canvas. I love that the room has 2 huge windows that bring in a lot of natural light, so it really can be a dreamy space if we stop our dawdling or avoidance of it. 

Now call me Fixer Upper crazy, but I'm really digging this shiplap trend these days. I love how much texture and character that it gives the room- without being over the top. I think it is understated and wow-factor-y AND DIY friendly. 

Slate herringbone floors and shiplap walls || Studio McGee:

Shiplap walls, beadboard ceiling:

Studio Mcgee Shiplap Bathroom How to:

So Andrew, if I were you I would run... very fast. This may just be the project that breaks our 'please don't make me go to Home Depot anymore ever' stage. And ends up creating another series of sweaty Saturday afternoons filled with cursing and power tools. I think that I've found some budget friendly tips that will make the project easier to start and I can't wait to start lovingly convince and make decisions as a family with my unlucky partner.


Tuesday, February 9, 2016

Girls Night Recipe- Lemon Ginger Beer Bread

As a general rule, there is very little sanity in my home the hour leading up to anyone coming over. Whether we are good enough friends to not have to vacuum (bless you) or if you are a who-knows-what-will-break-next repair guy, I get frantic and frenetically clean until I deem it acceptable enough or get discouraged enough at my inability to keep anything clean. It is a brutal cycle, my friends, in which I'm always the loser.

One of the things that I do try to distract people from the unwashed windows is to have enough food and libations to keep you happy. This is where my trusty friend the beer bread comes in. Self admitedly, I am no great baker. The whole exact measuring and being careful about following a recipe thing is just simply not my thing. I love to cook mostly because I can just throw it together and see how it is. With baking you make one mistake and the whole thing is ruined. Beer bread is oh so simple though. No rising. No one million ingredients. Nothing that is beyond my novice baking level. This is my go-to beer bread recipe that I encourage everyone to try. 

Recently a couple girlfriends were stopping by after work and I planned on whipping up a loaf of the above mentioned beer bread, some brie, and vino- voila master hostess. After I got home from work, however, I realized that we were 100% out of beer... that my husband would let me use. With 100% no time left, I decided to go big or go to the store and said see ya later recipe in favor of my own contraption. Luckily- it was delicious and Lemon Ginger Beer Bread was born.

I love how dense and mildly sweet this bread is. It goes great with a spicy jam, brie, or olive oil. If it lasted long enough, I would love to try it for breakfast, but I think this loaf was gone after about 30 minutes.


3 cups all-purpose flour
¼ cup granulated sugar
4 teaspoons baking powder
1½ teaspoons kosher salt
¼ teaspoon black pepper
1-2 teaspoons lemon peel, grated (I got this amazing one from Penzey's spices with my MIL a couple weeks ago and it is a game changer)
1 twig rosemary, chopped into small pieces
1 (8 ounce) bottle ginger beer beer (I used Sam Adams)
¼ cup olive oil


Preheat the oven to 350 degrees and grease your 9x5 loaf pan.
In a medium bowl, whisk together the flour, sugar, baking powder, salt, pepper, zest, and rosemary.
Carefully pour the beer into the dry ingredients and stir until just combined. At this point the dough will be very thick and may not seem like there is enough liquid- there is. 
Transfer the dough into the prepared loaf pan. 
Drizzle the olive oil over the top of the batter and then bake until golden on top, approximately 30ish minutes.
Allow to cool (I always use a cooling rack) for 15 minutes before slicing.
Bread will slice very chunk-ily... you can call it rustic.
Serve with all things delicious and a full glass of vino.


Monday, February 8, 2016

Motivation on a Monday

Today is a good day for a good day, faux gold foil, inspirational art, printable wall art, bedroom decor, office art, motivational art:

There are a lot of mini-projects spinning around my head right now and I'm not sure if all the ideas are motivating or debilitating, so in an effort to increase the chances of getting anything done I'm going to call it motivating. I don't know how successful my mind tricks on myself will be, but I'm hoping to focus extra energy on these three mini-projects until the end of the month.

1) 5k Pace- 

Normally before I finish a race I plan out my next one to continue the momentum/motivation. Obviously there wasn't a ton of forward thinking with the most recent race and when I got to the finish line I didn't have any set plans on what would be next. This weekend I ventured out to a local free 5k race and breezed through it. When it was over I realized that I hadn't actually worked that hard and didn't push myself. There was no huffing and puffing or need for water at the end- it was actually pretty anti-climactic. I ended up placing second in my age division with an 8:17 pace, but I would really like to focus on speed this month and see where that can get me. As a distance runner my normal routine is to tack on the miles, but this month I want to push my limits and try to actually get faster. I have some fun speed workouts that I hope to mix into my  normal routine to shave off some seconds!

2) Office Face Lift- 

When I started my new job in June it went from 0 to 100 really quickly. I never really got settled into my office and these days it is just a big mess. It is cluttered with Staples' orders, boxes of historical information that I haven't even opened yet, and the odd workout sock here and there. None of this is particularly conducive to creating a calming space; I feel a little bit like a document hoarder with no taste. I want to really spruce up the space with pictures and some homey touches, but my goal for this month is to just organize my office. After the clean up is done... then I hope to use this as inspiration. 

3)Spring Cleaning (Or Trying to Find the Floor) Closet Edition-

Just like I moved into the office full force, my closet is in some serious need of some TLC. There are legit boxes that haven't been unpacked and my shoe collection exists in a suitcase simply laid open on the floor. Andrew's closet on the other hand is perfectly organized where you can even see the color of the carpet. I can't let him win that moral victory especially since we used to have to share a tiny closet in California that was responsible for 90% of our bickering. I hope to  knockout donating clothes I don't wear anymore and organizing the space well enough to actually locate my clothes on a daily basis.

For the shortest month of the year I'm hoping that time is friendly to my to do list. 

Friday, February 5, 2016

Fort Bend Kia Half Marathon Blooper Reel

It has been a week from race day and I'm just now un-burying my head in the sand over some race day whoopsies that I inevitably did. I can't seem to make it through a race without making myself look like an imbecile, but hey some people get happy with endorpins, apparently I get goofy. And by goofy I mean embarrassing, weird, and ultimately a big klutz. So (if you're not at work and you so oblige) spike your coffee, read on, and begin to feel significantly better about yourself.

1) Cone of Shame- 

Cheezburger dog nom nom nom isolation cone of shame
When the race started it was still dark out for the first few miles. First I want to say that I'm incredibly grateful for this... it got pretty warm pretty early and I really needed those first few in the dark. However, running in the dark just feels funky to me. I rarely- if ever- run in the dark (especially by myself because #toomuchforensicfiles) so I was feeling all sorts of weird when the race started. Add that to the fact that I was trying to see my mom on the loop back, so admittedly I was quite distracted. Oooops. I hope you see where this is going. While trying desperately to not get chased by the monsters in the dark and see my mom, I totally plowed over a traffic cone. Owww. A little tumble later I was pretty much convinced that my leg was bleeding out and my time left on this earth was limited. I wouldn't allow myself to look down for the next mile because I just knew that the sight of the wound was going to be a good enough reason to slow down, so I bravely trucked on. Finally after feeling the drops of blood run down my leg, I gathered enough courage to check out the wound. I took a deep breath and looked down... nothing. There was barely a knick on my knee and the blood that I was so sure running down my leg was not the only thing non-existent missing- my pride also flew the coop.

2) Hello Stalker- 

selfie stalker creeper
Around mile 8 I had slowed down, but was still feeling great. I'm a big fan of following the beat of my own drum and by that I mean following the beat of my music. I do a lot of air drumming, some scattered fist pumping, and some sweet shoulder dancing. I was in the middle of a solo dance show when I look over and yell out (name changed for the privacy of the victim) TIMOTHY?!? The poor soul, a mere 2 feet away, turned his head and looked cautiously terrified at the psychotic lady screaming his name. All the sudden I realized that this man had no idea who I was. I spit out 'oh hi, sorry that was creepy, I've taken your cross training classes at my work gym, I love it, sorry that is creepy, shouldn't have yelled your name, you're doing a great job..... ugh i'll just be by myself over here". The trainer 'Timothy' hesitantly realized I wasn't going to murder him and even managed to say 'oh hi Shay, you're doing great.' I was so grossed out by creepiness, but to add insult to injury we basically paced each other for the rest of the 5 miles. It definitely minimized my dance moves.

3) Water Vom- 

gross vomit disgusting barf
Almost there, almost there, almost there... THERE! What an awesome relief to cross the finish line. I got my medal and was abruptly stopped by a random water table in the center of exit corral. I grabbed a water and chugged it, but didn't quite chug it correctly. The water went down the wrong tube and all the sudden it reappeared and flew from my mouth into the closest trash can. I looked up, pretty much shocked that I just vomited and as I look up I see the line of sports medicine students all there to support the racers. The last thing I wanted to do was be poked and prodded by an overzealous student, but I as I looked up trying it avoid their stares I noticed that they were all doing their best to avoid me as well. No idea what I did to gross them ou-hhh, yeah I had water vom dripping down my chin. 

4) Keys pleasssssse- 

sad crying rachel mcadams mean girls tears
This is the worst. This isn't a blooper, it is a downright curse. You see I didn't share all the boring details online, but a few weeks back one of our vehicles got broken into and we had to redo all our locks (house, work, cars) as well as all the other annoying things that it takes to get your identity back. When my mom and I carpooled together in the morning, I took her keys and stored them in my handy dandy (zipper and velcro) water belt. I curse myself at the audacity I had to make a joke about if the keys fell out, I knew some great locksmiths. Well, the keys fell out. About 5 minutes after I managed to water vom all over myself (see above) I realized the keys were NOT in their designated pocket and started to lose my sanity. There was some hyperventilating, a lot of snapping at any suggestion of hope, and more than enough pitiful 'woe is me' statements. In an effort to ABSOLUTELY NOT LET MY MOTHER KNOW THAT I LOST HER KEYS, I decided the sane thing to do would be to go immediately back onto the course and start walking it for any sign of the dearly missed keys. As I was batting back tears and reversing the miles that I had just worked so hard to rack up, Andrew heard some magical words over the loud speaker. The keys were swiftly located at lost and found and I had to immediately apologize for the smoke coming out of my ears. 

So there. All the gory details. I'm a maniac.